Be kind to yourself – you are not crazy!
We’ve had quite a few posts lately catering for our ‘mum’ sides so I thought I’d do one specifically to remind you all once again that you are brill mums but also you are ‘More than a Mum’.
I read an interesting article today written by a man (Yashar Ali) as a message to all women that they are not crazy. Before you think this is a patronising suggestion have a look at the article on the Huffington Post website and you’ll see just how illuminating and enlightening it is.
I wonder how many women reading this blog post (after reading the article) will be able to identify men in their lives who ‘gaslight’ them. This is not a ‘man-hate’ post but a ‘love women’ one! What struck me in the article is that we allow this to happen to ourselves – all the time! As mums we even take on the extra burdens of the children along with our various other roles – accommodating, soothing, making up for, encouraging, absorbing, covering up for etc.
Sometimes I listen to my internal dialogue and realise that what I am telling myself, or allowing others to make me believe, is really not helpful and in some cases damaging. We need to acknowledge this and stop it!
As women, and especially as mums, we get used to not only putting ourselves last but at times putting ourselves down. sometimes we do believe we have nothing interesting or significant to say or that our opinion doesn’t stand for much even if it does count. Things can get on top of us or we don’t feel ourselves or the us we were pre-baby and we start to think maybe we are a little crazy. We need to stop this unhealthy thinking not only in order to be good examples for both our daughters and our sons on this issue but also so that we are not stunted in our dreams.
One particular line that stood out for me in the article was, ‘From the way women are portrayed on reality shows, to how we condition boys and girls to see women, we have come to accept the idea that women are unbalanced, irrational individuals, especially in times of anger and frustration. These are the same women who stay in relationships they don’t belong in, who don’t follow their dreams, who withdraw from the kind of life they want to live.’
We must make sure we are following our dreams and living the kind of life we want to live as a mum but also as a woman.
This week check what you are allowing people to say to you and more importantly, make sure you’re being nice to yourself!